Dear Sunshine |
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Do you Need what you Want !?
One day I was sitting in my yard wondering what is it that made people different? Why are some people very successful while others feel so miserable and let down? What did some do right that others didn’t? My train of thoughts swept me through a maze of queries and I soon found myself struggling to find answers. But the one question that kept popping back into my head, over and over again was – ‘Do I need what I want?’ And my answer was, of course, ‘Yes, I certainly do need everything I want.’ I am sure everyone will agree with me on that. No arguments there, certainly!
It was quite confusing at first. Need and want! Do they mean something different or are they just two different words with the same meaning? Ok, so I decided to define the two words first, hoping that’d give me something to work with.
How would one define the two terms, want and need? Want could be defined as something the human mind craves for. Something born out of thoughts, dreams and desires. But want belongs to the future. Now, what is need, then? Need could be defined as something the mind or the body demands immediate satiation. There is an urgency to this demand and it makes one realize that it is part of the present. There is no escaping its magnetism. There can be no procrastination. A want can be left unattended indefinitely with no immediate alarming consequences. A need cannot be ignored and has to be attended to. When or how a need is addressed will make a great difference to the ultimate outcome and there I saw the first glimpse of the answers to my question.
Want and need are very much a part of our everyday life. Without wants, there is no creativity; no progress. But without need, this creativity never gets expressed.
Well, how do these two emotions manifest themselves in our daily lives? How do they mould our behavior and character? How do they affect our achievements? I realized that there is more to it than the obvious and that got my train of thoughts going faster.
I decided to take a look at want first. Everyone has wants. Our wants may be derived from different sources. But the most common forces that drive our wants can be attributed to the reaction of our senses. We see, hear and feel the things that happen around us. They trigger our desire to possess them or to emulate them. It is a natural feeling. The resultant reaction differs from person to person. Some feel jealous, or become angry. Others may become emotional or irrational while some feel desolate or despondent. But there are some people who’ll perk up to realize that, if they really tried, maybe they could also achieve some of those things. Their want is thus born. They sense an ambition growing in their minds. Now they know what they want but still are not ready to obtain them. To achieve this, they have to convert their wants into needs and that’s where efforts and focus come into play.
Besides the above, there are other sources, called the inner sources. If we delve deep into ourselves, we’ll realize that there are things we could do to improve our own lives as well as the lives of those around us. These are in-born traits. Everyone has these qualities to differing extents but only certain people put them to work. Poets, scientists, and entrepreneurs and politicians are but a few examples of such people. They do not emulate others instead they cause others to emulate them. They do not wait for others to tell them what to do, instead they make others do what they want them to do. They become leaders!
So how does one go about achieving these wants? Simple! Just convert these wants into needs. That’s where positioning comes into play. Just craving for something is not enough. It requires conviction, determination and a single-minded devotion to turn a dream into a reality. This is what sets apart the dreamer and the achiever. At some point in their lives, successful people would have converted their wants into needs. That’s the point when we position our minds and bodies to actually get what we want. That is the point of no return. – crossing over from the ‘wanting’ stage to the ‘needing’ stage. From that point onwards, the dream and the desire turn into a fierce demand, a burning passion and that’s when ‘need’ is born. Nothing can dissuade one from reaching his or her goal now. Although there may be other factors that decide the ultimate outcome, we’d have done our best and most of the time we may end up getting what we want or at least the satisfaction, that we really gave it our best.
I have a few examples I’d like to share with you to emphasize my point. Let’s begin by listing out a few of our most common wants. Everyone likes to be healthy, rich, get promotions at work and have harmony at home. Naturally, most of our wants will be motivated by these factors. Everyone knows that these are essential for a successful life. These are the wants we have. But how many of us actually achieve these ambitions to our fullest satisfaction? Some of us do, others don’t. Why? Because we let our wants remain wants. We do not care enough to convert our wants into needs. I hope my examples will throw some light.
Get rich quick: Don’t we all love it if we could make it happen? So what do we do? We buy lottery tickets! But some of us are really serious about winning something sizeable. So what do we do? We improve the odds. How? By simply buying more than one ticket. But then here’s where our ingenuity comes into full play. We gather a group of like-minded people and pool in our resources and improve our odds dramatically. That’s what I refer to as positioning. You position your self to win by converting your ‘want to win’ to a ‘need to win’. Of course, despite this, a jackpot win is not assured since the odds are close to 24 million to one. But you did give it your best shot. That’s what matters. On the other hand, if you desire to win the jackpot but do not even buy a ticket. Well, that will just ensure that, that want stays a want forever!
Staying healthy: Well that’s something everyone wants. Actually, staying healthy is a need and not a want. So what do we do? We eat right, sleep right and exercise right. If you don’t do these things right, then we’ll realize that this is one of those unique situations where we stand the risk of turning a need into a want and trust me, we never want that to happen.
Promotions: Every one wants promotions at work. But only a few do get promoted. And if we observe closely, we’ll notice that it is mostly the same few people who keep getting promoted to higher and higher responsibilities and consequently to higher pay scales. Is it favoritism on the part of the management? No. Of course not. It is just that these people have realized the fact that merely wanting to get promoted doesn’t get them anywhere. Converting their wants to needs is what gets them to where they wish to be. There are certain proven tools that help achieve promotions and they can be recognized very quickly. Higher education is one of them. Specializing in your chosen field of work often helps in accelerating the promotion process. Increasing your awareness of the industry in which you work helps you to grow within the organization. This may be achieved by reading the related trade publications as well as by attending seminars and training programs. But above all, it is your ability to think like your boss – how would he have handled this situation – kind of approach that hones your skills and knowledge to reach the next level. However, in a lighter vein, I would suggest that, you must restrict yourself to just thinking like your boss and not acting like him [or her] or you’ll soon be revising your position from ‘wanting a promotion’ to ‘needing a job’.
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